Simple Is Better – When the Holidays are Hard ... for Lots of Reasons
When I was about 10 years old, I remember a Christmas morning that was anything but great. Growing up on a small Wisconsin dairy farm, there were cows to milk, animals to feed, and chores to be completed before we thought of opening up a present. Even on Christmas morning, the outside work came first.
This particular Christmas morning was terribly cold. Like way-below-zero cold. We couldn’t get a tractor started, which meant accomplishing other things was impossible. Equipment used to get food for the cattle didn’t work. The food itself, called forage, was frozen and impossible to break apart. The water sources for the animals? Also frozen.
It was a miserable morning.
Cold, tired, and frustrated and way past normal breakfast time, we gathered around the dining room table to eat. Normally, we ate in the kitchen. Since this was a holiday, we ate at the dining room table, sticky barn clothes and all. This was not normal. We never ate at the dining room table just out of the barn.
Christmas breakfast was always a unique menu. Christmas bread in the shape of a Christmas tree, homemade by Mom. Warmed grapefruit with marshmallows and candy canes stuck in the middle and hot chocolate made with real milk. While we ate our food, it was very quiet. Everyone was exhausted from just trying to get equipment running. After breakfast, we wouldn’t be opening presents as chores still weren’t done. Breakfast was so late my mom questioned about making Christmas dinner.
While the morning had been a disaster, the challenges stretched far beyond Christmas morning. Finances were super tight. Only a few presents nestled under the for-real Charlie Brown Christmas tree cut from our woods because there was no money for a pretty tree. My entire family knew things weren’t great. It seemed surreal to celebrate wildly when everything felt stifled and not very fun.
After much cajoling, a tractor finally started. Eventually, all the animals were fed. Late afternoon, sun’s rays glittered through the long, skinny windows in our dining room when we were able to have somewhat of a Christmas dinner. This dinner felt a bit more joyous than breakfast. Every animal was fed and watered. Our simple presents were better than nothing. Mom had made Baked Alaska for dessert. A true surprise bonus.
The holidays can be challenging and difficult for many different reasons. Death of a loved one is a common reason why the holidays are hard. They may also be challenging for lots of reasons: financial challenges, things outside of our control, broken relationships, addiction, the list goes on and on.
If you or someone you know is feeling a bit beat-up this fall, the Handling the Holidays grief workshop is for you. It’s an opportunity to explore how lowering our expectations for the holidays can be helpful and more realistic. The workshop won’t remove your pain and disappointment. It might equip you with some ideas and thoughts of how to make the next few weeks more manageable because your expectations are more realistic.
The Handling the Holidays workshop is this Sun., Nov. 15 at 4 PM Central Time. It will be a comfortable place to explore how we can celebrate the holidays even if the rest of our world isn’t making sense. I’d love to have you join me this Sunday. Here’s where you can register.
What We'll Explore Together
During our time together, we'll look at some of the expectations we carry into the holiday season and how those expectations can sometimes make an already difficult time feel even harder.
We'll talk about giving ourselves permission to do things differently, recognizing what feels manageable, and finding ways to approach the holidays when life doesn't look the way we hoped it would.
My hope is that you'll leave with a few helpful thoughts and practical ideas you can carry into the coming weeks. We can't always change the circumstances we're facing, but we can give ourselves a little more grace as we navigate them.
Workshop Details
Date: Sunday, November 15, 2026
Time: 4:00 PM Central Time
Location: Online via Zoom
Registration: $7.99
I'd love to spend this time with you. I hope you'll join me!
Blessings –
Dianne
Holy God – There are so many reasons why we may not be excited to celebrate the holidays. Equip me with ways that I can journey through the holidays in a way that makes sense to me. Amen.
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